Tales from the Bus: Jerry and Rockin' Joe

People. They really blow my mind sometimes.

This evening started like many others. A long pleasant walk to the bus top heading into work. It was at the point that I approached the all too familiar bench and I saw a man with a bushy beard and large pack full of stuff animatedly discussing the finer points of open container laws with another gentleman that I knew tonight was going to be special. Luckily I had my headphones in and could thus take a seat on a nearby curb without being drawn into the debate. The man who was debating with... we'll call him Joe, got up and went to the fast food place across the highway leaving just Joe and myself at the bus stop.

What?! Can we get these?!

Source: Kristina Hoeppner

After watching Joe out of the corner of my eye for several minutes, I noticed the headphones. At first I assumed Joe to be a crazy homeless man, but now I realized Joe was just rocking the hell out. And maybe drunk. I went back to enjoying my music, but was soon interrupted when Rockin' Joe threw his hands in the air and began laughing loud enough for me to hear him. I had the volume up all the way, just so you know. Joe then got up and began dancing (or doing Yoga, still not sure) right next to the curb of the six-lane highway with lots of traffic. Crazy was back on the table. The other guy eventually came back with a burger. Our eyes met and we both smiled lightly, shook our heads and went back to ignoring Joe. I've had a few moments like that riding the bus.

The bus finally came and Rockin' Joe took a seat somewhere toward the back. A couple stops later, two young gentlemen took the seat behind me and part two of my adventure began. Before the bus even started moving, they began to argue what would do more damage to an iPhone in an Otter Box: A CARTA Bus or a hammer. Both made solid arguments, but I was swayed more by the argument of a bus weighing "a hell of a lot more than a hammer." The gentleman cited the fact that one can pick up a hammer and not a bus as evidence. I assumed Bruce Banor had already been eliminated from the equation.

That contact lens is just gone man...

Source: Ahmed Fayaz

A few minutes later, I overhear one of the gentlemen (Bus over Hammer Guy) speaking on the phone with (what I hope was) his significant other. In the middle of this broken record cycle of young love compliments the dialogue swiftly shifts to "No Jerry, you can't use my phone to call your dad!" Having watched the show Parks and Recreation, I can't help but laugh at anything along the lines of the phrase "Dammit Jerry!"

As I'm sitting there trying to suppress a chuckle, I get the follow-up. "Jerry, if you break my iPhone... if you drop it... if you crack the screen... I swear I will f*** you up right here on this bus!" I faked a coughing fit to cover my laughter. A few more miles down the road I also over heard "I'm twenty-one years old, I am a fully grown man!" If you're twenty one and don't see how that's funny, rest assured you'll get the punchline in the next nine years or so. Don't worry, it took me a while too.

Riding the bus: Always an experience...